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March 18, 2022

Everyone deserves sexual pleasure. It may feel like your last orgasm is a hazy memory from a life lived long ago for many women. At Funtasia, we're on a mission to change that. Coming into a sex shop might feel overwhelming, especially when you're a bit older. That is why we've made this handy sex toy guide for mature women, so you know what your options are. 

Sexual dysfunctions are common at every age, but increasingly so for postmenopausal women. It is thought that this is because of lower estrogen levels. 

Using proven sex coaching advice and techniques, you can awaken your sexual self at any point in your life. 

Why Is there a different sex toy guide for mature women?

Every body is different. 

Your sexual desires, sensitivity, and interests are bound to change as you age. According to a survey, over 85% of postmenopausal women reported at least one sexual dysfunction. 

Your quality of life is essential, and for a high quality of life, you need a satisfying sex life. Whether that sex life is alone, with a partner, or with many partners, you have options to keep things sexy and pleasurable. 

Sex Toy Guide for Mature Women

Postmenopausal women are more likely to face sexual difficulties. Over 80% of women found that women who had completed menopause reported at least one sexual dysfunction. 

Those researchers found that these sexual issues "significantly impact women's self-esteem and quality of life, and cause emotional distress, leading to relationship problems."

The most prevalent sexual issues were

So these are the sexual dysfunctions in mature women we'll be focusing on today. If none of those applies to you, don't worry, these toys are going to spice things up regardless!

Hyposexual Desire Disorder - Low or No Sexual Desire

There are many theorised causes of low sexual desire. However, science has never been able to identify a single culprit solidly.

One thing that has been shown to help is increased blood flow to the vaginal area. How do you get more blood flow?

We have a few suggestions.

Pussy Pump

Are you struggling to experience desire the way you used to? You're far from alone there. For when you want to be aroused but can't quite get there, we've got the Pussy pump by Pumped. Using this little device, you'll have additional blood flow to your vulva, which enhances arousal. 

The Le Wand

When you have incredible orgasms, you desire sexual pleasure more often. So, if you want to have better orgasms, start with the classic Wand style. This wand by Le Wand is ultra-strong while still looking rather delicate. It will help you have more powerful orgasms either by yourself or someone else.

Clitoral Arousal Oil

It may sound like a fantasy, but we can assure you this is very much a reality. The Sensuva clitoral arousal oil is like a vibrator without a vibrator. Just one or two drops of oil directly on your clitoris will help increase blood flow in a sensational way. It's also all-natural and not some strange tablet. It's totally safe and shockingly powerful.

Whatever you decide to help you with your low sexual desire, we support you! Just know that there isn't anything wrong with you, and there isn't anything to fix. Try some simple lifestyle changes first. Such as learning more about yourself and enhancing your sense of intimacy can benefit you immensely.

Realising and accepting that your body has changed is challenging. Learn what pleasure means to your new body by trying a pleasure mapping exercise. You may be surprised at what you earn!

Painful sex

Menopause causes countless changes in your body and hormones. It is far from a "small" life change. After menopause, many women suffer from symptoms of dyspareunia or painful intercourse. This challenging disorder means that it is painful, if not impossible, to be penetrated. 

If you want to try for penetration or know your other options, we've got you covered.

Vaginal Dilator Kit

During and after menopause, your vagina will go through many changes. Yes, there are products for this. We recommend Dr Laura Berman Alena's Vaginal Dilator kit. Use each size conjunction with something like a vibrator. Doing this can help you learn to enjoy penetration again. 

Tango by We-Vibe

Using a dilator on its own isn't likely to help you get the results you need. Help your brain and vagina along with the process. Try pairing your dilator with a bullet vibrator like the Tango by We-Vibe. Since it is coated in ABS plastic, the vibrations are extra powerful!


One of the main culprits behind painful sex is a lack of lubrication. As women age, you produce less and lesstransudation or naturally occurring lubrication. To help, you need a lubricant that is hypoallergenic, long-lasting, and great for sensitive skin. That's why Pjur has come out with a line of special lubricants for just such issues. 

Our personal favourite is the water-based Sensitive Glide or the Silicone for Women options. 

Don't worry - there are plenty of more choices. We'll have a whole article on these soon. 

If you're having pain from sex, your body is trying to tell you something.

Listen to it and take the steps you need to get back to the sex lifestyle you're used to. 

Less Satisfying or No Orgasms

Your difficulty to experience orgasm may cause you distress, but you can do something about it.

One of the primary reasons women stop having orgasms is focusing on how their body looks rather than pleasure. 

Start feeling more confident in your sexuality by practising by yourself.

That's right. We're inviting you to masturbate more and worry less!

If you're new to masturbating, don't worry. Take time, experiment and feel comfortable with your body.

You can try taking yourself on a date to help you set the scene. 

Satisfyer Kegel Balls

It's normal for your orgasms to change over time. Your hormones and your body do. Why wouldn't your orgasm? There is an easy remedy for this (and incontinence). Try using Kegel balls like these from Satisfyer daily. These will help not only increase your sexual pleasure and your orgasm strength, but they can help boost your libido too! Just use them for about 30 minutes each day.

Lush by Lovense App Controlled Vibrator

You can control this yourself with the app or share it with a partner!

Like typical Kegel balls, you're meant to insert this toy and hold it using your pelvic floor muscles. This, in turn, helps strengthen your pelvic floor. This one has the bonus of potentially giving you orgasms while you use it!

The Womanizer

No list could be complete without it. The Womanizer is the only sex toy clinically proven to give 100% of women orgasms. This fantastic sucking vibrator is even the key to squirting for many women! If you haven't cum in a while, stick with the best of the best. Trust your pleasure to Womanizer. 

You Deserve Pleasure

At any stage of life, pleasure is a fundamental human right.

If not having a healthy sex life is causing you distress, you're far from alone.

You deserve help, and you deserve orgasms. If you want help picking out a toy, stop in one of our three stores and have Sexpert help you choose one. 

You can also reach out to our resident Sexologist, Elaine Turner, to get personalised support in your sex life. 

Get out there, Get in there, and Get off there!

Elaine S Turner

Resident Sexologist |Certified Sexologist | Sex Coach | Pleasure Product Expert

Instagram: @SexWithElaine


5 min read

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